I used to have Friday nights to myself while my husband got together with friends for tabletop gaming. Since the Friday night game dissolved I found myself occasionally missing having a little time to myself at home each week. Last night we had dinner with his parents before they headed out on a road trip, and my husband stayed overnight at their place with his uncle, who needs at-home care.
I did not feel the least bit guilty about leaving him there.
I got home, stripped out of my work clothes and into something comfy, (put away the large amounts of food his parents sent home), and indulged in one of my favourite guilty pleasures: House.
I hadn’t seen the season opener yet, so it was something entertaining to curl up with on my “night off”. It left me very thoughtful though (in fact, I had trouble getting to sleep for a while afterwards thinking things over). Not only in how his behaviour will change the show (no spoilers please!) but also how mental illness and treatment are approached.
The last few years have been very hard on me, with constant uncertainty about my health and battling illness after illness. Now that I am finally looking at (hopefully) a period of stability, I am allowing myself to examine some of the emotional issues associated with all this, and for the first time in my life am seriously considering counselling. I have been tentatively reaching out to friends and family who have gone through therapy in the past, trying to get a feel for it and what sort of questions I should ask going in. In fact, trying to sort out the emotional side of my health is what prompted me to start this journal in the first place. Perhaps I’ll delve into this topic more later.