I woke up with a notable lack of spoons today. The cooler weather is lovely but definitely making my joints stiffer and more painful in the morning, so it was a real effort to get out of bed, especially since I’m still not sleeping well. Saturday I had a glorious 12 hours of sleep, but one good night’s sleep in two weeks only gets you so far.
A hot shower helped some of the stiffness (and I always feel better when I’m clean), but between that and getting dressed I ended up spending a couple more spoons. Breakfast was simple and I fed the cats, then laid back down on the couch and closed my eyes for a few minutes. If hubby wasn’t able to drive me to work I probably wouldn’t have made it in today.
Other than that, I love the cool weather since I can actually wear my sweaters and light scarves. Tomorrow night is my CPAP test so we’ll see how that goes. I am still losing weight- not a lot (maybe half a pound a week) but I’m pretty pleased at my progress so far. I had a slight setback the week my family visited (so. much. good. FOOD!) but even then gained less than I expected by being moderately careful. The weight loss should also help the sleep apnea. (Honestly, the weight loss should help EVERYTHING.)
I had my first allergy shot in a month, yesterday. First I had my flu shot (which went quite well) and an ant bite in the same week, then family in town, so that’s why the delay. It’s only a moderate reaction, so I’m glad about that. An eye doctor also opened right next door to my allergist, which is great timing since I picked up a nasty scratch in my line of sight on my right lens. It’s my bad eye so it’s not as bothersome as it could be, but still annoying. I am due for an eye exam anyway (it’s been 18 months) but still debating if I want new frames or not. I will definitely remember the progression lenses this time, though!
And speaking of all this medical stuff, I finally sorted out some things with my medical reimbursement card. I will not go into it too much here, since I am partially angry with the system and partially disappointed in myself. Basically, I could have saved on a bunch of out-of-pocket expenses. At least I am properly informed now, all late bills and fees are paid, and I can use the card for the rest of the year, but I find this sort of thing supremely frustrating.
I have been completely off my anxiety meds for a week now and it has been… rougher than I hoped. I did so well during the taper I thought that I was in the clear, but that is not the case. A combined new-grocery store (mild) anxiety attack and heavy nighttime traffic culminated in a teary breakdown on an unsuspecting hubby. I have to keep reminding myself to not keep this stuff bottled up- talking about it with hubby helps, and writing about it here. I may start seeing a new therapist, but overall I’m trying to keep my worries from triggering more anxiety. The irony is palpable.
In a way, being medicated for a year means that I now have to re-learn all my coping mechanisms for anxiety. I do feel like I better understand when I’m mildly depressed versus when I’m anxious, but my next big progress step will probably be putting anxiety in my category list on the side, here. Obviously, I’m not quite there yet.
In fun news, I had Monday off for Veteran’s Day and got lots of little jobs around the house caught up. It was a very relaxing and productive day- I could use a few more of those. I am also still casting around for holiday gift ideas- I really need to get on that. One of my neighbours already put up their Christmas decorations, which I think is just TOO EARLY. *grump*